morbid by nature.

Posted by vanillaspice on 6:06 AM

All that I'm living for, all that I'm dying for,
All that I cant ignore, alone at night,
All that I'm wanted for, although I wanted more,
Lock the last open door, my ghosts are gainin on me.

I believe that dreams are sacred,
Take my darkest fears and play them,
Like a lullaby, like a reason why,
Like a play of my obsessions,
Make me understand the lessons,
So I'll find myself,
So I wont be lost again.

Anyway my eldest brother... is SO WEIRD(in Alice's tone). I have no idea what he dreamt of when he decided to pick me up from trainin the other day. Most probably to show off his car. HAHA. well it's nice after he chged the body kit and stuff. So dragged Mi and Nuri along. Sorry twins. cant fit u guys inside. haha.

Trainin was ermmm FUN. I missed 3 freakin goals lahhh. so dumb dahh. my finishin totally sucks. Cess and Nad helped create chances for me but i missed. TSK. and and and... the great news is... WE GOT A FRESHIE WHO ASPIRES TO BE A KEEPER!!! HOOOOOORAY~~~~ now i wont hear anymore bitchin from coach nor cikgu persterin me to be the goalkeeper. GO PAT~~

3 tests comin up. A&P, Biosensors & Biosignals and MATHS!!. haiyohhhhhhhhh. Im only lookin forward for ONE test. which is... A&P(anatomy and physiolgy) prac test. yay. coz i love A&P. haha.

AND GMP LAB REPORT~!!. dammit. Ohhh i love my GMP lecturer. Coz.. he teaches me some Italian. HAHA. like Coméstai ?? haha. And he's funny. Makes me call him Big Boss Man or Big Daddy Alfred. haha. And deyy Antonio Salieri is ITALIANO~!! yay.

ASK-HAH~(azhar) i want that lame marvel game. the one i dunno how to play. HAHA. I LOVE VENOM. so violent but sooooooo effective. I proooooooooooo(goal). HAHA. AND DIVEK IM NOT DIRTY MINDED OKAY. u are the one with the perverted mind. u misinterpreted my statement. boooo divek boooo~

AND.. i think i have obsessional neurosis. go look it up.( im always inclined to having psychological disorders. haha. that's why i need to consult a psychologist. LIKE RIGHT NOW!!)

WORD OF THE MOMENT : SOMETIMES!!

GOOD TO GO PIGGIES~~~~

Dad says "lagu apa ni ? lagu rock ??"
What the hell is wrong with ROCK music?? i dun think he means the mainstream rock. coz i was listenin to Our Truth - Lacuna Coil. that's not the first time. ohhh stop it already. stop askin me to listen to songs which are meaningless, lack lustre and has got really bad vocals. IM listening to the song not you.

should it hurt to love you ? should i feel like i do ? should i lock the last open door ? my ghosts are gainin on me.

coz im brokennnn

Posted by vanillaspice on 4:57 AM

Dude... like what the freakin frack.. my lappy's got viruses and spywares dahhh deyy. SO scary one when ur computer just prompts u "PROTECT YOUR PC" and den ur wallpaper changes to a blue screen with words like "Your PC is under attack by....." . That just freaked me out.

Anywayyyyy... For the freakin first time Biosensors Lab was quite fun. It's all because of.... Linghui screamin "SHUT UP LAHH" a few times at Ashley[that was super hilarious] and also due to the fact that WE ACTUALLY KNOW HOW TO CONNECT THE STUPID CIRCUITS. WOW. we prooooo~

And also... my brain is actually going back to sponge mode.. absorbing info and actually understanding. No more downtime for my brain. hoooooooorayyyyyy brain~

Went to sch with Nad and Ain just now. Ohh God how i miss Nad's bitchyness and idiotic-ness. haha. with her bulging big eyes. And when we make fun of her eyes.. she tells us she has THYROID. HAHAH. dun make me slap u Nad.

I think i really need to consult a psychologist. seriously... help ?

UH HUH HER~!! say sooooo u want toooooo(it's a song)
I know i so need to get fabric paint.

And ppl have a hard time pronouncing it. i've heard like "hoo-hahh-her", "ooo-ahhh-her" and whatever else. Haha.

And my Dad's like whatever lohhh. In the morn when i was gettin ready to go to sch...( i always blast music from my phone to entertain my soul)... den he went like... "wahhh rock song!?". With a little tinge of discontent in his tone. Dude... Lacuna Coil is like not heavy satanic metal or anything. IT'S GOTHIC-ROCK-METAL-ESQUE. But i know it does sound abit ermm scary at times... haha. but what's wrong with rock songs ?? must i revert back to hippoty hoppoty and R&B ? im sick of the clichéd overrated overplayed mainstream music lahhh.

BUT. RIHANNA's hair in her Take A Bow video is nice lohhh. HAHA. althou the lyrics to the song is abit dumb. haha.

ANYWAY im lookin forward to trainin. i wanna score goals... improve on ball control, shooting and bla bla bla.... but most importantly FINISHING dahh. my finishing sucks.

Ohh yahh Inky told me (by lookin at the models at the prac lab).. she told me that the uterus is the bladder. HAHAHA~!! so whatever lohh..

ALRIGHT GOOD TO GO PIGGIES~

Totentanz

Posted by vanillaspice on 9:03 AM

Dude i just like watched Criminal Minds : MOST EVIL. HoOoOoO~ it's like the best show ever if ur into like psychology, behavioural sciences and mental disorders(i feel like im repeating myself).

There's this guy, his name is Ed Gein. Psycho man. he mutilated exhumed bodies of women, skinned them alive and made their skin into like a lamp shade. HAHA. how Hannibal Lecter-ish is that ? But he was only 12 on the Most Evil scale. TSK.

There's this other guy, his name is Arthur sumtin. He murdered children... and then shifted his attention to prostitutes coz he contracted HIV from one of them... so he was on a mission to abolish ermm all the courtesans he hired ? haha. He even ermm nibbled on the remains of some of his murder victims. BUT HE WAS ONLY 18 ON THE SCALE. TSK.

Gary Heidnick, 22 on the MOST EVIL SCALE. Why ?? He tortured his sex slaves for more than 3 months. Wanted them to give birth to his babies so he can have his own community. When they didnt get pregnant, he tortured them by electrocution. And den cut them up and put the chunks into the blender with dog food and forced the rest to eat them. WOW. really. WOW.

Criminals with history of psychotic disorders are normally ranked lower due to the fact that they arent "aware" of what they are doing. And what triggers their psychotic homicides ? their environment !! abusive childhood, psychosis and..... how the society treats them. SO... better not inflict them with mental anguish coz they will take revenge. an eye for an eye.

AND AND... the frontal lobe is where all the dysfunction beginssssssssss. haha. soooo.. i dun wanna head anymore balls as it might have some effect on my frontal lobe. HAHA.

I havent bathe since i came back from sch like 3 hrs ago. WOW time flies so fast when u watch good shows. I was like channel surfing coz i was watchin Most Evil, Life, Bones, MTV I love live(just in case MTV decides to be nice to me and play Evanescence).

Anyway im still plagued with the constant remarks that i keep gettin. Emo, sensitive, MERAJUK!!!. wth wth wth. Well i guess that proves my bipolar-ity. Im a bit neurotic at times. Am i really that emo or sumtin ? dude i dun get it. sometimes im just playing around. or maybe i've developed a reflex. who knows whatever the fcuk they're talkin bout.

ANYWAY... aside from my affliction, this morning i crashed MahhMeyyyMohhh's lecture and clinical lab. wah kao the lecture hall so high one. i dun like. the lecturer not that bad. The lecture was not bad either. Only i dun understand the acronyms. Mohr's circle was SOOOO Mohr's circle. I probably like lost 30 marks ?? for not drawing the principal stress diagram. HAHA. too bad. And the stupid hand exercise thingy is like gettin on my nerves lahh... need to calculate the exact amount of TORQUE u want ur shaft to be in. thanks. luckily there's Microsoft Excel. haha.

Im searching for catharsis... help ?

Dude looks like im playing Beats with my eyes closed. haaaa.

GOOD TO GO PIGGIES ~!!!

emo my rectum.

acoustic set.

Posted by vanillaspice on 6:22 AM

Lacuna Coil - Heaven'S A Lie (Live Acoustic Mtv).

Lacuna Coil acoustic set. Heaven's a Lie. i love this song dahh dey. and whoever tells me Cristina Scabbia cant sing i'll slap u.

Enjoy.

bitchyana italiano.

Posted by vanillaspice on 12:50 AM

Scorre lento il mio tempo
Quell' ultimo respiro mi rassicura sento gia
Agonia senza fine che mi hai dato forse no
Non sarei qui....

Hello hello...

Yesterday's soccer marathon was FUN FUN FUN. in the morn, soccer with Yuzil and MaaMeyyyMohh(MiMi). And den we chilled at my hse. Wahhh... Yuzil is a future Tekken pro ahh. hahah not bad sia she play. Mimi is like unpredictably(no idea if the word exist) asleep. Like when ur watching teevee... and then she like suddenly dozes off. haha. nocturnal ppl are like that i think. And den we went off to bedok to meet Nas(na+na=nas), Lus(Lu+Lu=lus), Atik, Naj, Feeza, Nuri, Belo(feeza's friend), Naz and Cikgu. SO FUN DAH DEYY.

And i swear to God... Nike Veloci super nice to wear lahh dude. Dude it's like WOW. finesse. belissimo. It enhances ur shooting power. hahah. but i already got some scratches on mine. TSK. Anyway our clandestine soccer match was fun lahhh. hahah. Carpet grass field...woooooh. nice to play on.

Today... i had a tad of a bitch fit. i have no idea why. i cant be blame for my bipolar tendencies. it's innate. haha. Maybe it's due to the fact that i have to come to sch on a tuesday. tuesday= no sch for me !. But the lab was kinda okay lahh. used the autoclave machine, washed my hands dunno how many times. Got temporarily blinded by counting of bacteria colonies. One was classified as infinite colonies. haha. it's kinda disgusting. kinda... not that bad lahh.

And MeeeMeee thanks for the treat ahh. but i hate it. and im not THAT sensitive. And i still dun understand what the deal is with my hair. And Cristina Scabbia is like the epitome of HOTNESS. hahah.

Quizzes comin up. urghh~. lancet and hand-exerciser-thingy drawing. arghhh~. how i wish i was as well endowed as Picasso in art. TSK.

Fredrik Ljungberg damn hott ahh. look at his pouty lips. haha.

Cristina Scabbia has really damn hot eyes dahh dey.

no idea what she's doing but i like her outfit.. haha.

Joshie Farro. hot hot hot.

Similarities between Cri and Joshie ?? ITALIANS!!. "Italians do it better" HAHA.

OKAY SLEEPING TIME~

Ciao~

Snow White Queen.

Posted by vanillaspice on 1:48 AM

"What did i say about your hands Wacken ??!! I CANT HEAR YOUU !!" - C.Scabbia askin Wacken festival go-ers to clap to the beat.

Haha. that's so cute dahhh deyy. yahh im obsessed. i cant help it. she's bloody cool.

Anyway, yesterday's visit to Thye Hwa Kuan moral home was FUN FUN FUN!!. as usual im always a little bit intimidated initially. But gradually ... i adapt. Only four of us went. Atika Kamsan, MiMi the OwL, Vanessa(atika's friend) and V.sPiCe. Wow and i met the resident that Khai was tellin me about. The one who's vain(indicated by her excessive use of accessories) and ermm exhibits symptoms of social withdrawal. hahah. it was a ermmm rather intriguing.

We tried to wave, but she only responded with looks of ermm repugnance ? haha. seriously lahh deyy. But the others were okayy.. We interacted with the residents. and one of them made us play Miss World or sumtin of that sort. I was Miss Egypt. but i declined... i wanted to be Miss Italia!!. haha. I was the first runner up dahh deyy. Atika won the pageant. haha. she was Miss India!!!. lol. Wow and they even watched American Music Awards dahh deyy. Dude i didnt even catch it.

Anyway, we made mini pizzas. we didnt get to taste it... coz ermm we rejected the offer. HAHA. such egoistic maniacs. no lahh we were just too busy interacting to even eat. Mimi and Khai are like pros man. Super reserved when handling the residents. Im not much of a people person... so i forced myself to open up. And Vanessa was super funny ahhh. so kental sia. In a nutshell, it was FUN!!

Dude i bought Nike Mercurial Veloci !!! hooooooooooooooo~. i wonder what the coach is gon bitch abt this time. at least it's not as striking as my red ones. dude im like so itching to kick some balls. ahhhhhhhhhh~

I experienced yet another epiphany. I realised that... music constitutes like at least 85% of my life dahh deyy. Coz i think that ppl talk a lot. and mostly it's of frivolous blatherings. and so why waste my time listenin to silly conversations when i can listen to uber nice songs ? Nothing against talking... but sometimes i just dun feel like listening to anything except music. yahhh i might be a music fiend.

Dude... i hate drawing/sketching. coz i suck at it... and im supposed to sketch designs of lancets and hand-exercise-er-thingy. damnit.

Im done. lemme now go indulge in some of Lacuna Coil's and EV's videos. haha.

GOOD TO GO DUDES~!!!

Our Truth

Posted by vanillaspice on 5:58 AM

want to stay another wayyyyyyy....
want to stay another wayyyyyy....
take another chance to find a distant sanity,
and turn ur pain in truth....

Wahhh Scabbia's voice is finesse dude. Im bored today so lemme blog.

Im currently gettin bored of beats. haha. dammit. i need more songs with super nice percussion arrangements and guitar riffs dude. Anyway all thanks to Joanne, i got FIFA07 in my PSP. whooopdeedooo~. I HATE FIFA08. poopy shit. PES sucks also(coz i dunno how to play). haha!.

Cost accounting today was as usual. soporific. maybe i just need to get the lecture notes then i'll be fine. i enjoyed my lunch today!!. hooooooooo~ CHEESE PRATA DUDE!!!. hahah. yeahh sorry for eating so slow kay Divek. the prata showed me some tough love.

"Guys fight war, girls stay at home and cook" <----- what a primitive notion. DUDE... like wake up. We're way past that. And according to Alice Pieszecki, "Men should knit and Women should run the world". ALICE PIESZECKI FOR PRESIDENT!!

Dude i think i have ADD. i cant keep my attention to one thing. i will always tend to look at or do other things. SHIT. now i have to add another diagnosis to my "hospital patient tag thingy". A.D.D. Attention Deficit Disorder.

And pardon me and for my DUDEness... i've always wanted to say it... and now... im stuck to it.

Dude i miss the super cathartic powers of western classical pieces. haha. I've just rediscovered how beautiful Moonlight Sonata movement 1 is. WOW.

Joanne says to Linghui "you should be thankful that u have an English teacher"(points at me).
Elly says "I AM THANKFUL TO HAVE MATHS TEACHERSSS"(points at Joanne, Linghui and Constance). haha. but really lahhh. thanks dudes for teachin me maths and whatever shit that im super blur at.

Tomorrow is make-ppl-feel-appreciated-day. off to THK moral home for disabled. Hoooo~

I got some lame pics to post.

look at this FATTY!! so fat sia. "oooh u one big fatty, FAT CAT FAT CAT!!" - Marjorie Dawes. haha!

cRiZ Mozzati, Lacuna Coil's drummer!!

Dude it was supposed to be a drawing to illustrate the nasal passages. HAHA! look closer and u can see the vestibules and chonchae!!

See how soporific cost accounting was ? i dunno how to draw eyes. sorry. later look like monkey.

Credits to Divek for drawing the ears and the moustache...HAHA.

Hope seizes the invisible, Achieves the imposible, Look up and see that there are no limits. - wise words from Lacuna Coil!

Dear God, i wanna have SELECTIVE AMNESIA. haha!

Angel's Punishment

Posted by vanillaspice on 6:03 AM

Dude... like where's my car ??

Anywayyyy... went for trainin on monday.. like DAMN. it's been like what ? almost a month without trainin ?.. damnit. I skipped GMP and went for my long overdued much anticipated return to the field. HAHAHA. as if. I dragged Mimi along too. haha. We(Feeza, Nuri, Mi and I) decided to act like the freshies since they havent seen us before. So when we got to the stadium, we went like "ermmm excuse me... is this bowling ??... coz we're lookin for bowling.." haha. they gave us blank stares but it was spoiled coz Angie was the one who responded. hahah. trainin was fun... ALMOST scored. DAMNIT!!!. it was a really nice ball ahh dude.. i cant believe i missed it. it was 1 on 1. just me and the goalkeeper. DAMN!!!. i suck.

Went to sch on tues for supposed session of studying/project-ing. but i ended up playin CS on Linghui's lappy. But after that we went for gym. hooooooooo~ i only did the cycling thingy. i need my leg muscles back. haha. and after like 20mins of the strengthening session on the bike... my legs went all jelly on me. that was not fun dude.

Today... maths test is finally done dude. hoooooo~ the teacher is ermm... or shud i say Hannibal Lecter... he's a little strange but funny. Quaint. yeahh Quaint. Our test was open book dude. more like open mouth. coz most of us were discussin the answers. haha. i was stuck on the first question ahh. i cant rmb how to do integration and differentiation. i dun think my brain is well adapted to maths. Anyway Linghui helped me ALOT on the test. hahaha. And she's super addicted to PATAPON dahh deyy. PATA PATA PATA PON!!

Saturday goin to the THK/TKH moral home for the disabled. WooooooooH. at last.

Im sick of hearing the same old things over and over again. endless frivolous rantings of life's ordeals and selfish intentions.

Dude. i need a break. pretty pls.

CAN'T YOU TAKE ME AWAY FROM YOUR LIES ??!!

Risvegliarmi.

angel's punishment.

Posted by vanillaspice on 6:25 AM

Im soooo lowwwwwwwww
Im soooo lowwwwwwwwww
IM SOOOOOO LOWWWWWWW
IMMM SOOOOO LOWWWWWWWWWWW

WHY CANT YOU HEAR ME ??!!

Hahah.. okay that was a song. CHILL. Anyway... thanks to Haizel im now addicted to BEATS on PSP. but it's a super duper fun game. Kinda like Djmax, but u play using ur own songs. which is freakin cool ahhh. And u require the culmination of precision and coordination. HAHA. and u might go blind sometimes.

Maths.. maths... maths... dear God, pls bless me with mathematical prowess. i seriously need it.

I WANNA GO FOR TRAININ DAHHH DEYYY~. tsk.

Daniel commands "PROTECT THE PSP TEAM". haha. that's when i need all my friends in formation to protect me while i play my psp while walkin. yes we have a formation. basically everyone just stands in front of me. haha

I miss my darling kental cuzzins. saturday pls hurry up.

im runnin out of words to say lahhh. so i'll post pics okay...